


Pervy Minds Think Alike - Jiraiya

by BridgeToTheSky



Series: Somebody To Love - Naruto Edition [2]
Category: Naruto
Genre: But it is mostly a GIFT, Can you believe it?, F/M, Fluff and Smut, Lemon, Oh god, Okay yes partly it is a series, Shameless Smut, Smut, This is for a friend!!!, actually fucking sincere in places, how did i get myself into this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-11
Updated: 2016-07-11
Packaged: 2018-07-22 21:19:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,334
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7454326
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BridgeToTheSky/pseuds/BridgeToTheSky
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>jiraiya finally meets his pervy match. </p><p>A gift for the lovely Jess (ss-shitstorm, who loves jiraiya as much as he's always deserved).</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pervy Minds Think Alike - Jiraiya

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SS_Shitstorm](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SS_Shitstorm/gifts).



> *crawls out from hell, shaking demons and spirits off my dangling ankles before rising to the surface*
> 
> I. AM. ALIVE.
> 
> Sorry, everyone! My net's been off for the last 14 or so days *sobs uncontrollably and shakes off hands that attempt to console* But in the MEAN TIME I've had tons of time to catch up on some important fics! This is a long time coming for my friend SS_Shitstorm!

He paused in his tracks, his eyes going wide as he comprehended the scene taking place before him:

 

You, your legs tucked underneath you and Make-out Paradise brandished in your lap.

 

Jiraiya felt like he could see the stars go out before his very eyes, the world reducing to cinders.

 

“Jiraiya-kun …” You said, flipping a page. “Did you … write this?”

 

…

 

“Uh —” he said, shaking in his sandals. “Uh, well, I, uh …”

 

Damn. And he really liked this one, too.

 

Women didn’t like him as it _was_ , but when they found out he wrote erotica? That he was a _pervert?_ It obliterated all chances he had in courting them.

 

And there was no way to get out of this one — even if he said he didn’t write it, it was still in his bag, and he shared it with no one else. Damn.

 

And now all he could do was wait for the inevitable — the ass-kicking, the beat-down that he always received by the women in his life. His bones never did feel the same after Tsunade had gotten through with him. Oh, and he was looking forward to such a nice night …

 

He winced, anticipating the pain.

 

And then —

 

“I … maybe I shouldn’t be giving my opinion,” You began with a soft chuckle. “But … honestly, I think the oral sex scene should have happened on chapter eight instead of chapter ten.”

 

Jiraiya’s eyes popped open, and when nothing but silence greeted him, he took a risk and began to slowly turn his head toward you.

 

You were still on the floor, your attention rapt on his draft.

 

“What … did you say?”

 

“Why would they wait until chapter ten? It doesn't really make sense, does it?"

 

...

 

Were you ...?

 

"Are you giving me," Jiraiya began, his mind working to mold this scene into something he could comprehend, " _advice?_ "

 

You sighed, laying the stapled pages down. "I knew it; I've overstepped my boundaries. Please, forgive me. I didn't mean to ..."

 

You bowed.

 

Jiraiya blinked. Furiously. And said:

 

"You're apologizing," Jiraiya went on, pointing a finger at himself, "to _me?_ "

 

"Well, of course," You said, rising hesitantly. "It is your work, after all, and you asked for no one else's word. _Gods,_ it's _always_ like this; I end up editing and reconstructing erotica whether I want to or not. Why can't I just enjoy the story without importing my word in?"

 

"You do this often?"

 

"Yes," You said with a regretful sigh. "Remember when you met me in that bookstore? And I was —"

 

"Buying books on cooking?"

 

"Oh," You began to giggle, followed by a dismissive way of your hand. "Good heavens, no! I can't cook for the life of me! I was looking through some smut, actually. I was going to buy, but you know, I was, well, _me,_ and I just had to put them back! I haven't been satisfied with anything even remotely erotic since Make-out Paradise! And you …"

 

You rose, to which Jiraiya took a step back, admittedly still nervous as to where this would lead.

 

"You're the author, aren't you?" You said, voice tinged with amazement.

 

Jiraiya wished he could say he had learned his lesson about trusting women, about opening up in these matters. But you were so … odd. Perhaps … this time …

 

"Yes."

 

You squealed, stars birthing in your eyes as you clasped your hands together. "This is amazing! I've never met an author I've liked before! Well, that might be because I'm sort of picky ... but this is the first time it's ever happened! You're _just_ as tall as I thought you'd be!"

 

Jiraiya blinked the astonishment from his eyes, before giving a jovial laugh, hand going behind his head, "Ah, well! This is the first time someone's ever been happy to meet me!"

 

Well, not true. There was Kakashi, but he had taken their friendship to an odd place given time.

 

And he also wasn't a cock-hardening female.

 

You were about to say more, but your toe caught on the thickness of the stapled papers from the draft, and began to tumble. Jiraiya was quicker than lightning, gripping on to your shoulders, pulling you close.

 

"Oh, gods, I —" You said, stopping when you rose your head and realized how close you were to Jiraiya's face.

 

He could smell the fragrance of your lip gloss; some sort of strawberry mix that sparkled back at him, enticing his lips to bridge the space between yours. He resisted for a second, choosing, instead, to appeal to you with the little charm he felt he possessed.

 

"Hey …" he said, voice dropping low. "Do you think you could demonstrate what should happen? You know, in the draft? I haven't made any revisions yet, and it is hardly finished, and ... well, I have gotten criticism over my foreplay."

 

Your eyes flickered wide with understanding, and a blush came over your cheeks as you lowered your gaze. “So you’re great with the actual fucking part?”

 

Jiraiya chuckled at your crude language. “Fucking is what it is. Easy. Primal. Animals can do it, and do all the time, but foreplay? I … can imagine it just fine in my head, but putting it on paper? A little difficult. I …”

 

Jiraiya rose a hand, his fingers tangling themselves in your (h/c) tresses.

 

“… often forget the feel of a woman’s hair, or …”

 

He crept his hand against your back, sensing the soft, feminine dent of your spine.

 

“… the elegant curve of her waist. And then what do I do? I’ve lost priceless points of sensory detail. I feel like a fraud, if I’m honest.”

 

Jiraiya’s right hand left your hair in favor of your neck, and he could sense your frantic pulse that lay beneath your skin.

 

You gasped as he came to your ear, his lips gracing the shell. “That’s why,” he began, his voice sinuously low, “I’m happy I have you, (Y/n)-chan …”

 

He kissed the shell of your ear, and you grasped his shoulders. He dwarfed you, absolutely, and he loved it. So small, so lovely, Jiraiya could feel the heat between his body and yours, and he _ached_ to be inside you. Gods, if he weren’t a sannin, this would prove difficult.

 

“Teach me,” he said, his voice firm in its purr. “Show me what good foreplay is —”

 

He was not allowed to finished — your hands came to his cheeks and forced his lips to yours in a chaotic, lustful union. The surprise from your nerve only lasted a second before his lascivious nature kicked in, and he wrapped his large hands around you, delighting in how easy your sash came away and your robe opened for him. You wore no bra, your breasts spilling from your clothes, and your panties were pretty and tantalizingly flimsy.

 

Easily torn away if, say, he wanted to …

 

You let out a pleased sound as he easily lifted you from the floor — why was it so hot when a woman was turned on by his strength? — and he pressed you against the wall. Your hands lost themselves in his forest of ivory hair, your tongue meeting his and swiping against it with expertise.

 

A growl sounded from the bottom of Jiraiya’s throat as his tongue wrestled yours. Gods, had he finally done it? Found a woman just as lustful, just as sexually adventurous as his own? He had a down period in his twenties, thinking such women didn’t exist, and throughout the decades he’d found the same kind of disappointment. Oh, and when they were his speed, they either didn’t like him (surprise, surprise) or were … too much his speed. A little too … adventurous.

 

He’d never be able to look at an umbrella and a jar of peanut butter the same ever again.

 

But Jiraiya was giddy, now, exploring your chest, exciting your already pert nipples with his thumbs. You seemed to be right in the middle, a perfect, happy middle. Just right. _Ohh, hoho!_ … he bucked you, his length brushing against your crotch, and you released the kiss to give a desperate moan.

 

He rose you a little higher, his hot breath falling against your nipple before he sucked it into his mouth. Jiraiya heard you suck in a breath as his tongue swept at the neglected nipple, his hand fondling your other breast and squeezing against it.

 

“Jiraiya …”

 

Oh, gods, you were no Tsunade by any means, but you were indeed a handful. Jiraiya’s thumb came over your nipple and you purred against him. He left mindless kisses against your other breast, delighting in the feminine flesh.

 

His tongue licked over your skin, returning to your neck.

 

“The — the hands,” You breathed out as he explored your neck in kisses. “People … writers, I mean … they always forget the importance of _hands.*_ ”

 

At that, he pinched your nipple in between two of his fingers, rolling it side to side with the pads. “Oh, yeah?”

 

“ _Oh,_ **_yeah._** ”

 

He chuckled, watching you shed out of your robes and letting them pool to the floor. “So is that it?” he smirked as he said it, his eyes meeting yours. “You want to be …”

 

“Very much so,” You said with a submissive purr.

 

Jiraiya chuckled again, his teeth baring like a wolf’s. You and him were of the same mind, and he was loving it. His eyes slid to your tantalizing, perfect pink panties, and instinctively, Jiraiya’s index and middle finger singled themselves out.

 

He pressed against you, the hardness of his chest meeting the delicate softness of your own. You closed your eyes as he hooked his two fingers into your panties, bringing them down to your thighs before sliding them against your excited labia.

 

“Ah …” You arched into him, griping his hair.

 

Jiraiya smirked; the ladies always loved the hair, if nothing else (and usually it was nothing else).

 

His four fingers covered you now, massaging you labia before one ventured inside of you, mingling with your moist warmth. Your head thudded against the wall, sucking your lip into your mouth. Gods, you looked amazing like this. He slipped into the exposed dip of your neck and began to place hot, lingering kisses against your throat, the rumbling in his throat reverberating against your skin.

 

“Ah … Jiraiya, oh gods, I —”

 

It was then that another one of Jiraiya’s fingers found its way inside of you, and your sentence was lost to a moan.

 

He bucked against you, his erection full and hot against your leg now. He felt you reach out a hand from between the two of you and slide it down to his crotch.

 

“Urgh,” Jiraiya crushed against you, his teeth baring against your neck.

 

You were right. Hands were underestimated. Your sweet, feminine hands working against his clothed erection was like heaven. You kneaded him through his robes, tugging at him, to which his hips followed your motions.

 

Your hand slipped into his robes, and then it was his turn to bite his lip as you found his length and gave him a steady stroke.

 

“We need to have more space …” Jiraiya growled, and stole his hands away from your warmth to pick you up. You gasped and then giggled as he threw you over his shoulder as elegantly as he could, given his feral arousal, and went into the hallway in search for your bedroom.

 

You fell into the sheets of your bed when he dropped you gently. He towered over you, tugging away at his clothes. He was waiting for you to ask about the giant mark that scarred his chest, but when you simply licked your lips and met his eyes in a heated gaze, he smirked in return.

 

“What?” You said. “It makes you look distinguished.”

 

“I like your choice of words,” he replied, pressing you into the mattress with his weight. His fingers found their place against warmth, but this time three fingers found their way into you, and your hands grasped at your breasts, rolling your hips.

 

“So wet,” he mocked with a deep chuckle. “Was this the draft or me?”

 

You looked delirious with his activities, but an answer came out in a rough, struggling voice, “If it was — ah, oh, _gods_ — if it was from the draft … doesn’t that mean it was your doing, as well?”

 

He laughed — you were quite funny — and he rewarded you with a fourth finger. Huge and pumping inside you, coiling and looking for that one spot. “Yeah,” he said. “I guess you’re right.”

 

He rose from you, completely focused on his pumping fingers. He experimented with you, tortured you; he took fingers away before adding more, he tapped gently against your desperate g-spot, he idly brushed your swollen, agitated clit until —

 

“Oh, gods, Jiraiya!”

 

He didn’t stop, and in that moment he was determined that he never would; licking the saliva from his lips, he helped you ride out your orgasm, relentlessly working against your tightening pussy. He kept his other arm against your thigh, preventing you from pulling them together in your frenzy. You thrashed but it was nothing against his strength, and to add icing on the cake …

 

He brushed hot breath against your clit, and gently sucked against it, riding you through each and every spasm your orgasm allowed you.

 

Finally, you came down from your high. Panting happily, your face contorted with bliss. “You …”

 

There was eye contact again, and it was much more heated than anything that night, and … it was sexual, yes, but something in the softening of your gaze seemed considering, and Jiraiya felt himself reciprocating.

 

It was meaningful. Did he want that? You had let him touch you — that was special in its own right — but now …

 

He was a shinobi. He could die, at any moment at any time anywhere, he knew that. He knew. But still …

 

Jiraiya didn’t get to be introspective for long; you reached for him, your sweet hands falling against his cheeks. His eyes fell to your precious pink lips.

 

“Let me …” You began, eyes heavy lidded. Your hands fell against his brutalized chest and appreciated the muscles there. “Let me repay you, please …”

 

Jiraiya tilted his head downward, raising his fingers, still moist from you, and sucked them clean. “If you wish,” he said once he was finished, giving you a kiss against the cheek.

 

He rose and lied against the bed, an arm propping up his head as he waited for you.

 

“On your back,” You said softly, and when Jiraiya complied he watched you untie his sash before falling against the pillows, waiting with a frantic, excited heart.

 

He felt himself free of his clothes within seconds, and your hand came to grip him.

 

He let out a breath when he felt your own against the head of his cock.

 

“Jiraiya …” You said with a gentle stroke of your hand. “You’re amazing …”

 

Jiraiya smiled through the excitement. He could feel himself trembling as your lips fell over his head, and then begin to take him into your mouth. Warm and wet, you sucked against him, the bit of his cock that you could not reach being stroked by your palm.

 

The moment you began, he knew he wouldn’t last long. Not long at all. It had been so long since, since —!

 

You popped him out of your mouth, only to invite him in again. Your tongue bathed the head of his cock, swiping away any bit of pre-cum that might have risen there. Jiraiya gripped your headboard as your hands found his testicles, giving them a generous tug.

 

Only his shinobi endurance could prevent him from bucking into your mouth. You began a rhythm, humming against him, the reverberations against Jiraiya’s cock, causing him to curl his toes.

 

“Gods, (Y/n), you’re … you’re really …”

 

You wasted no time, your mouth entirely dedicated to its task. Your cheeks hollowed as you fell against him faster, your hand against his thigh. You popped him from your mouth and devoured it again.

 

Jiraiya gritted his teeth. Oh, oh, gods, he was going to …

 

Again, your mouth left his cock. “I notice you don’t have many of your female characters swallowing …”

 

Jiraiya laughed through the immense pleasure of your stroking. “Never … had it … before …”

 

And you took him in your mouth again, pumping him with a tight fist, sucking against him fervently, and it was all he could take before —

 

“Urgh!” Jiraiya felt him empty into your mouth, your mouth still busy sucking, your tongue busy swiping it up and swallowing.

 

You rode him out just as he had done to you, and his guttural shout followed as his semen fell, again and again, against your tongue.

 

You released Jiraiya for good finally, crawling and then falling against his chest while he caught his breath.

 

“I hope you use that for the sequel.”

 

He laughed through his exhaustion. “Are you kidding? That’s … going right in the revisions.”

 

Jiraiya’s hand came to your back, drawing invisible circles against your heated flesh. You snuggled against his side — at least you found him cuddly — and gave a pleased hum.

 

“Hey,” Jiraiya said, seconds later.

 

“Hmm?”

 

“You,” he began, staring at the ceiling. “You don’t have to do anything else for me tonight, if you don’t want to.”

 

You rose your head from his chest. “What do you mean?”

 

“I’ve only dreamed of getting this far with a woman like you,” Jiraiya went on somberly. “I can’t ask anything else of you.”

 

And then there was your hand again, soft and sweet. It lingered across his chest, into the barren parts where muscles and skin should have been, to his neck and his cheeks. His eyes slid to your fingers, then to meet your eyes again.

 

Sweet. Understanding. Maybe he was just dreaming all of this — no woman had ever wanted to be this close to him for this long, had ever really wanted to soothe him like this. Maybe you hadn’t intended to soothe him at all, and were just simply doing it, just had that power over him.

 

“I think I’d be a pretty weak partner if I told you to stop there, Jiraiya-san,” You said softly. He could feel your hair fall against his ear and chin, you were so close. “You’re quite sad, aren’t you?”

 

He pulled you close. He was sure, by now, that he was hallucinating; when had anything gone so well for him before? Jiraiya decided that he didn’t much care, preferring only to enjoy it before something happened to end it all.

 

He smiled against your skin. “How could you tell?”

 

You smiled back. “You can do one thing for me?”

 

“Anything.”

 

“You could get me going again.”

 

You reached for his hand and guided it back to your labia, still wet but not nearly as swollen as before. And with that you guided his face toward yours and brought him into a kiss.

 

“Sure,” he said against your lips, and searched for your clit.

 

You perked when he found it. Jiraiya circled it with the pads of his fingers, his tongue flashing over your lips. You opened your mouth for him, gladly, and met his tongue with your own.

 

Your leg smoothed over his torso, and Jiraiya gripped it gently. Soon — and Jiraiya couldn’t figure when — you were above him, arms on either side of his head, rolling your hips into his helpful hand.

 

His fingers infiltrated your wet folds, now fully swollen from his ministrations. His thumb brushed against your clit and —

 

“Oh, Jiraiya …” You moaned, breaking the kiss that felt hours long. “Jiraiya, I’m ready, I ne … Please. Please. **_Please._** ”

 

He toppled you as gently as he could. He knew what you needed from him, and he was only so happy to oblige, feeling less apologetic than before with the mere idea of his cock buried deep inside you.

 

Admittedly, he was not as fully erect as he could be, but no matter; that would soon change. Your legs rested on either side of his body as he adjusted against you, and …

 

… slid himself inside your warmth, and you gave a long, deep moan at the penetration. Your nails dug into his shoulders, to which Jiraiya bent forward to nip on your neck.

 

“Why is everything about you so big?”

 

How many more times would you make him laugh? Jiraiya slowly let himself slide into you, hopeful that he wouldn’t hurt you from his girth and at the same time relishing in the feel of you pocketing him with your warmth. He bit into your shoulder, his hand reaching to squeeze the headboard with his fist.

 

“I dunno,” Jiraiya replied roughly. “Why is everything about so _arousing?_ ”

 

He looked up only to see the blush come over your face at the flattery, and you turned from him quickly with a soft giggle. He rocked into you, experimenting only, and your eyes flickered with pleasure.

 

“Jiraiya …”

 

“Say it again,” Jiraiya said, rocking into you again. “I wanna hear it. I wanna hear it forever, c’mon.”

 

“Jiraiya …”

 

He began to thrust into you, some of his gentleness gone in favor of all things feral.

 

“Jiraiya …” You repeated, your nails piercing his back now as you enveloped him, your legs wringing around him as well.

 

Flesh slapped as Jiraiya kept on, mesmerized by the feeling of your tight pussy against him, squeezing him delightfully.

 

“C’mon, (Y/n) …” he pressed. “Let me _in,_ huh?”

 

“Jiraiya!”

 

He grabbed your hips, knocking into your hard, dragging you away from the pillows with his force. He brought a hand down to tease your clit, and you were screaming — screaming for _him,_ oh, gods, what a day — your breasts swinging with the power of his thrusts —

 

And that was when you reached up for him. One of his hands held your buttocks while the other kept to your waist as he bounced you with his thrusts, your hands in his spikes.

 

“Jiraiya! Oh, gods, I’m going to —”

 

Now it was his turn to beg you. “Please, (Y/n), please …”

 

He found your neck again and nibbled into the flesh there, and that was it. His name fell from your lips a dozen more times as you came, him holding you close, refusing to let you fall away from him as you squirmed, refusing to let you leave as his orgasm came for him as well.

 

He growled as he filled you. You rose your head to kiss him again, and it remained like that for moments more as the thrums of pleasure exhausted themselves from your bodies.

 

Moments later, your head against his shoulders, and his arms wrapped around your waist, sweaty and defeated and blissed

 

… Admittedly, it was you who spoke first.

 

“I don’t think it’s ever been quite that good.”

 

Jiraiya chuckled, one out of the many you had given him that night,a nd said, “Well, now will you look at that … I get to say some beautiful woman out there said that and it won’t be a lie from now on.”

 

You bounced with laughter while Jiraiya maneuvered to have the two of you settled against the bed. Officially worn, the two of you simply lied there, and kissed when you had the energy to. You took pieces of his hair and played with them, and when night smoothed over the sky, it was hard not to fall asleep to the rhythmic sound of howling owls huddled in the trees.

 

V

 

Your eyes opened. It was a boring, unmotivated two seconds before you realized what you had spent the night doing, and the you nearly flew from the sheets.

 

Sheets. You hadn’t been in the sheets; you had been tucked in.

 

You searched for Jiraiya but he was nowhere. You abandoned the bedroom for the front room, heart in your throat.

 

He wouldn’t … he wouldn’t just —

 

But before your brain could conceive thousands of self-loathing induced scenarios in which you had misunderstood everything and had given yourself to a complete stranger who didn’t and couldn’t care for you …

 

You turned the corner, and there was Jiraiya, sitting criss-crossed, arms crossed and a smile.

 

“Good morning,” he said, tapping his sandal against the end of your coffee table.

 

You smiled back, and tried to play it cool despite the amount of adrenaline and dizziness running through your system. “What? Is my window not comfy enough anymore?”

 

“I figured this would be a better location to see your face when you realized I hadn’t gone.”

 

“Horrible toad man,” You accused, though found it impossible to generate true anger.

 

Jiraiya held up his hands in defense. “Hey, no need for name calling here!”

 

You giggled, wrapping around the hastily-thrown-on robe around yourself. And when you rose your head again, Jiraiya’s expression was serious again.

 

“I have to go,” he said. “I wouldn’t if I had the choice, but I’m needed.”

 

You nodded, understanding. Right. Of course. Ninja stuff. You’d have to get used to that.

 

… on that thought …

 

“I understand,” You said, nervously following with, “And are we …”

 

Jiraiya raised an eyebrow. “Do you want to be?”

 

“Well, I thought we’d at least —”

 

“I figured, maybe, you’d want to —”

 

“Well, if we just —”

 

“I thought —”

 

The two of you stopped at once, and then collapsed into laughter.

 

“One at a time, I think,” You said, and gestured him to do the honors.

 

Jiraiya closed his eyes, smiling, and said, “I’ve never tried to deny myself a good thing before, why start now? We can … give this a try. When I get back, of course.”

 

“When you get back,” You agreed with a nod.

 

Jiraiya rose from the table, approached you and planted a soft kiss against your forehead. “Thank you. Truly.”

 

“No thanks needed.”

 

He gave your hand a grasp before letting go, and heading for the door. He opened it, flashing a goofy, toothy smile your way before heading through it.

 

You settled on the couch, feeling awfully satisfied. You even considered making tea before you realized —

 

… had you … had you taken “the pill” before you and Jiraiya …

 

…

 

…

 

… Oh no. *

**Author's Note:**

> *I remembered what you said about hands, and figured you were a hundred percent right.  
> *Inspired by YOUR fic, Jess. IT IS NOW A RUNNING GAG THAT WHENEVER WE WRITE SOMETHING SMUTTY AND JIRAIYA RELATED HE GETS THE READER PREGNANT I DON'T MAKE THE RULES OKAY IT'S JUST FACT.


End file.
